Family Therapy with teens and young adults in Denver Colorado
Move from conflict to connection
Parents
You’ve heard that having adolescents is challenging, but the fighting, cold shoulder and disrespect are causing you distress. Your teen is sneaking out to hang out with friends you think are a bad influence. They also are not doing any of the chores you request of them.
You’ve lost your own self confidence because your teenager constantly tells you how much you embarrass them. You know your teen needs more independence, but you’re scared to death that your teen will hurt themselves with the risky behavior they choose.
You try to have conversations about risky activities like sex, alcohol, drugs, and driving, but you never get anywhere! You worry that the good relationship you had with your younger child is gone forever. That feels really sad.
Fear and sadness are creeping into the rest of your life now as well. You’re afraid to go out and be social because you can’t trust your teen alone. You worry about what other families think of your family and your parenting.
You’re just trying to get by and balance all your family roles, but it feels like you’re running a marathon every day. You feel like you’re powerless to make any changes. You feel stuck.
Will you ever feel joy from parenting again?
Your family is experiencing conflict and distress
Teens/Young adults
Perhaps your parents seem to hover over you and worry 24/7. You just want them to leave you alone so you can do your own thing! Your friends are who you want to spend your time with now. All your friends are allowed to hang out without their parents hovering. Why can’t yours just leave you alone? You love them, but don’t need them right now. And sometimes you actually hate them!
Then you feel guilty for hating them.
Or, maybe you’ve moved out and started your life as an independent adult. But you and your parent(s) have never recovered from the teen years. You’d love to recover some of the closeness you felt as a younger child.
Get support to reconnect
When you come to family therapy, things can get messy at first. As we all work to gain trust together though, you’ll start to see more fun times again as a family. The fighting won’t disappear overnight, but it will decrease.
Family therapy will help you all engage in dialogue around sensitive topics and find solutions to the constant fighting. As we wrap up our work together you’ll feel less burdened and more connected to your teens and partner. This work can help you restore your peace of mind.
How I Work
Systemically
I believe in working with the whole family, not just the individual. To this end I strongly encourage as many people involved in the issues to show up to do the work.
The best reconnections happen in a safe zone, like my therapy office, where everyone gets to have a say, express their emotions and work towards healing. I believe that parental involvement is very important in the treatment of children and adolescents.
I don’t put much credibility into diagnosing individuals, so no one in the family need worry about getting a “label” of some syndrome or illness. I see a family and its problems as a whole entity that will need changing and healing of all of its parts and connections, not just the individuals.
Most likely, there is a pattern causing distress. This can be changed, if everyone fights against it together!
Play
I believe in using play techniques with families. Play has been shown to create positive feelings amongst family members, as well as shows you that fun and positive interactions are possible inside the therapy session.(1) Whatever can happen during therapy can also happen outside of therapy. Depending on everyone’s ages, interests, and therapeutic goals, we may play a board game, create a family art project together, play chase (in a local park), or many other play-based activities that can bring awareness to issues in a playful light.
(1) Green, Myrick, and Crenshaw. 2013. Toward Secure Attachment in Adolescent Relational Development: Advancements From Sandplay and Expressive Play-Based Interventions. Read article here.
Family Therapy can help you:
Improve communication
Have more fun
Strengthen family bonds
Establish and maintain healthy boundaries
Establish greater empathy and understanding of all family members’ needs
Improve problem solving abilities
Reduce family conflict
Improve all family members’ self esteem
Increase trust
Your family’s happiness is worth the investment!
Let’s work together to find joy in your family connections again.
FAQs
What IS family therapy?
This type of therapy focuses on the relationships between family members and usually includes several family members. This can be parents and children, step family members, grandparents, adult siblings, cousins--whomever is involved with the distressing problems that bring you in. Most times when a youth is the “identified patient” I will strongly recommend we use family therapy of some sort. The level of involvement will be decided with the therapist by all involved.
How long do sessions last?
Depending on what we are working on, sessions run either 50 or 75 minutes. I will always discuss which length is best and what the associated fees are.
Will you always see all family members during each session?
Not always, but mostly. There may be times when it makes sense to see a subset of the family, but we’ll discuss this and the reasons for this, before we do it.
Do you have evening or weekend appointments?
Yes, I have a limited number. Reach out to see if it feels like a fit and we can see what works with everyone’s schedules
How long will we be in family therapy?
It all depends and ultimately YOU get to decide! For the first few sessions I will “assess” your family dynamics to better understand your family’s style and needs. I will then ask you all to help define our treatment goals. In other words, when you can “graduate” from therapy. Depending on what you come in for, how many people are involved, and a number of other factors, treatment may take 3-18 months. Know that YOU are in charge though. You and your family can decide to leave therapy when you believe you’ve accomplished your goals. Therapy can also become lifelong, if it makes sense for you to come in for “tune ups” every few months or so.